Unpacking the Ick: Building an Authentic, Heart-Centered Coaching Business

In our digital world, marketing has become a language of its own. Flashy claims, manipulated narratives, and high-pressure tactics have flooded our feeds. Let’s break down a few of these trends and why they feel so “icky.”.

The 100k in Two Months Marketing Lie

Have you ever come across social media posts or reels where coaches boast about making six figures in record time—like “100k in two months”? It sounds impressive, right? But here’s the catch:

Lack of Context:

Most of these claims don’t tell you the full story. Were they in business for years before that big win? Did they have a massive audience already? Often, there’s no mention of the external factors—such as prior credibility or huge ad spends—that made these results possible.

Unrealistic Expectations:

When new coaches see these claims without any context, it can set them up for feelings of inadequacy. Comparing a first-year coach to someone who’s been in the game for five years creates a false narrative. This isn’t just demoralizing—it can actually derail your progress by setting you up for unrealistic benchmarks.

Gatekeeping Information:

There’s also a sense that the full picture is being hidden intentionally. If someone’s not sharing the “how” behind their success, you’re left wondering: Are they gatekeeping information to keep their secret sauce safe?

High-Pressure Sales Tactics: When Urgency Turns Toxic

Another trend that really gets under my skin is the high-pressure sales tactic. Picture this: You’re on a call with a coach, and before you can even ask a question, you’re bombarded with lines like, “If you really wanted it, you’d invest now.” Sounds familiar?

Manipulation Over Empowerment:

This approach forces you to make a decision on the spot, leaving no room for thoughtful consideration. It’s less about empowerment and more about coercion. The idea is to create a false sense of urgency, making you feel like you’re missing out on something crucial if you don’t act immediately.

Emotional Aftermath:

I’ve heard countless stories from past clients who felt pressured during these calls. Some even ended up doubting their own worth because they didn’t say “yes” to a high-ticket program. That’s not how coaching should work. Coaching should build confidence, not diminish it.

Normalizing Pausing:

Instead of pushing for an instant decision, I believe we should normalize taking a pause. Big investments require thoughtful consideration, and there should be no shame in setting boundaries or asking for time to reflect on whether you’re financially and emotionally ready for a coaching program.

The Overuse of “Energetic Alignment” as a Catch-All Excuse

We live in an era where “energetic alignment” is tossed around as a cure-all for any business hiccup. But let’s be honest: sometimes it’s not about the vibes—it’s about strategy.

Vibes vs. Data:

Sure, feeling aligned is important. But if you’re blaming poor results solely on a lack of energetic alignment without considering tangible data and strategic adjustments, you might be missing the mark. For example, a weight loss coach who only focuses on how “good” a client feels might ignore crucial aspects like nutrition and exercise plans that drive sustainable results.

Avoiding Accountability:

relying solely on the concept of energetic alignment can sometimes be an excuse for not digging into the numbers or tweaking your strategy. It’s easier to say, “It just didn’t feel right,” rather than sitting down and analyzing what might actually be improved in your offer or messaging.

Hustle Culture vs. Sustainable Effort

The debate between hustle culture and sustainable work habits is another hot topic in our space. While hard work is essential, there’s a difference between working hard and working unsustainably.

The Burnout Trap:

Many of us come from professions where caring for others was the norm—nurses, therapists, doctors—and we know all too well how burnout feels. Hustle culture glorifies relentless work without acknowledging that sometimes you need to step back, rest, and recharge.

Effort with Purpose:

Building a successful business isn’t just about grinding 24/7. It’s about finding that balance between putting in the necessary effort and recognizing when to take a breath. There are seasons in business: times for intense hustle and times for deliberate, mindful rest.

Changing the Narrative:

Instead of romanticizing non-stop hustle, let’s shift the focus to working smart. By acknowledging that business is a roller coaster with ups and downs, we can create strategies that are not only effective but also sustainable in the long run.

The Myth of “Building a Business Without Marketing”

I’ve seen posts where coaches claim, “I built my business without ever marketing,” as if being visible and building relationships is optional. But let’s face it—no one builds a successful business in complete isolation.

Reality Check:

Marketing is not just about shouting into the void; it’s about connecting with people, sharing your story, and inviting those who resonate with you into your community. When a coach claims they never marketed, it’s often because they had other advantages—be it referrals, an existing audience, or networking opportunities—that aren’t available to everyone.

Value of Visibility:

Visibility isn’t about being salesy; it’s about being authentic. Whether it’s through free content, workshops, or genuine one-on-one conversations, making yourself known is a crucial part of building trust and attracting the right clients.

Building Genuine Relationships:

If you’re uncomfortable with traditional marketing, consider relationship-based marketing. Focus on building real connections—this way, your message comes across as genuine and supportive rather than forced or contrived.

What to Do Instead: Building an Ethical, Heart-Centered Business

Now that we’ve unpacked some of the “icks” in the online coaching space, let’s talk about how you can create a more ethical, sustainable, and authentic business. Here are some actionable steps that have worked for me:

Share the Full Picture

When you talk about your successes, be transparent. Whether it’s a financial win or a breakthrough with a client, share the details.

• Include Context:
  If you made 100k in your first year, explain how multiple income streams contributed to that number. Was it through one-on-one coaching, group programs, or contract work? Let your audience see the full story.
• Break Down the Process:
  Instead of just flaunting the win, explain the steps you took. What were the mindset shifts? What challenges did you overcome? This not only builds credibility but also inspires others with a realistic roadmap.

Normalize Taking a Pause

High-pressure sales tactics don’t work for genuine connection. Instead, encourage your potential clients to take their time.

• Empower Their Decision:
  Let your clients know that it’s okay to say “no” or to pause and think things over. Your role is to provide clarity, not pressure.
• Set Boundaries:
  Be clear about your process. If you have limited spots, communicate the timeline for decisions, but avoid creating false urgency. Make it clear that if it’s not a full, committed yes, it’s completely fine to say no.

Combine Strategy with Intuition

While it’s important to honor your inner guidance, never underestimate the power of data and strategic planning.

• Evaluate the Numbers:
  Use analytics to understand what’s working in your business. Whether it’s tracking email open rates or social media engagement, let data inform your strategy.
• Stay True to Your Vibe, But Be Open to Adjustments:
  Find the balance between energetic alignment and actionable strategy. Your intuition can guide you, but always be ready to pivot based on what the numbers are telling you.

Embrace Relationship-Based Marketing

The idea that you can build a business without marketing is a myth. Instead, focus on cultivating genuine relationships.

• Connect Authentically:
  Whether you’re DMing on social media or hosting a free workshop, always prioritize real connection over a hard sell. Your potential clients are looking for someone they trust and resonate with.
• Offer Multiple Touchpoints:
  Not everyone is ready for a high-ticket offer. Provide various levels of engagement:
• Free Content: Regular blog posts, podcasts, or videos that offer value.
• Workshops/Webinars: Interactive sessions where you can share insights and answer questions.
• Memberships or Lower-Tiered Programs: Options for those who might not be ready for one-on-one coaching, but still want to learn from you.

Reframe the Hustle Narrative

Shift your focus from relentless hustle to a more balanced, sustainable approach.

• Acknowledge the Seasons:
  Recognize that there will be times of intense work and times of rest. Embrace the ebb and flow of business, knowing that both phases are essential for long-term success.
• Work Smart, Not Just Hard:
  It’s not about the number of hours you put in but about how effectively you use that time. Prioritize tasks that move the needle in your business and allow for rejuvenation.
• Self-Care is Part of the Strategy:
  Burnout is real. Incorporate self-care routines into your daily schedule, and encourage your clients to do the same. A healthy business starts with a healthy you.

Redefine the Sales Call

Sales calls don’t have to feel like a cold, impersonal pitch. They can be an opportunity for genuine connection and clarity.

• Offer Low-Pressure Calls:
  Instead of traditional “sales calls,” consider framing them as discovery or clarity sessions. The goal is to offer tangible value—maybe even a mini business planning session—rather than simply closing a sale.
• Make It a Two-Way Conversation:
  Use the call to understand the client’s needs. Ask direct questions about their goals, challenges, and what would truly make a difference in their journey. When the conversation feels mutual rather than one-sided, both parties benefit.
• Practice and Refine:
  Remember that sales calls are a skill. The more you do them, the more natural they become. Embrace each call as a chance to learn and improve, rather than a performance to be judged.

Actionable Tips for Ethical, Heart-Centered Growth

I know that navigating the noisy world of online coaching can be overwhelming. Here are some practical steps you can start implementing today to build a business that aligns with your values:

Audit Your Messaging:

Take a look at your current marketing materials. Are you sharing the full story behind your successes? If not, consider revising your content to include more transparency and context.

Create a Content Calendar:

Plan out your content strategy for the next quarter. Focus on topics that address common pain points among your audience—like the challenges of hustle culture or the benefits of ethical marketing. Consistency is key, and planning ahead will help you maintain a steady flow of value-driven content.

Set Clear Boundaries:

Whether it’s on sales calls or in your pricing structures, make it clear that your goal is to empower your clients. Share your decision-making process openly and invite your audience to do the same.

Build Multiple Engagement Channels:

Don’t rely on a single platform to connect with your audience. Explore options like Facebook groups, webinars, email newsletters, and live sessions. Each platform can serve as a different touchpoint in your relationship-building strategy.

Invest in Self-Care and Professional Development:

Schedule regular breaks and self-care activities to avoid burnout. Additionally, consider investing in mentorship or professional development opportunities that align with your heart-centered approach.

Gather Feedback:

After implementing these changes, ask your clients and followers for feedback. Their insights can be invaluable in fine-tuning your approach to ethical marketing and authentic connection.

Reflecting on My Journey: Lessons Learned

I want to share a bit about my own experiences in the coaching world—because trust me, I’ve been there. Early on, I encountered coaches who made grand claims without offering any substance. I sat through calls that left me feeling uneasy, and I even watched as friends compared themselves to seemingly “overnight successes.” It wasn’t until I started prioritizing authenticity and transparency in my own business that things began to change.

One of my first big realizations was when I attended a call with a coach who boasted about her six-figure launch. On the surface, it looked like a dream come true. But as I later learned, her “success” was built on an already massive email list and a hefty ad budget that she never mentioned. That call left me with a sour taste—not because the numbers weren’t impressive, but because the full picture was deliberately obscured.

I decided then that I wanted to do things differently. I started sharing the complete story behind my wins, including the setbacks and the lessons learned. For example, I opened up about a retreat I tried to launch that totally flopped before I successfully launched a group program. Sharing these vulnerable moments not only built trust with my audience but also reminded me that every setback was a stepping stone to success.

Another lesson was learning the value of pausing. In an industry that often glorifies immediate action, I learned that it’s perfectly okay to take a step back, assess your situation, and make decisions that feel right for you. This shift in mindset has been liberating—and it’s something I encourage every coach to embrace.

Building Your Authentic Business: A Heart-Centered Roadmap

If you’re ready to move away from the icky tactics and build a business that truly aligns with your values, here’s a roadmap to help you get started:

Step 1: Define Your Authentic Message

• Reflect on Your Core Values:
  What drives you? What are the non-negotiables in your life and business? Write these down and let them guide your messaging.
• Craft Your Story:
  Share your journey—both the wins and the setbacks. Authenticity comes from vulnerability, and your story is your superpower.
• Stay Consistent:
  Ensure that your message remains consistent across all platforms. This builds trust and creates a strong brand identity.

Step 2: Create a Transparent Marketing Strategy

• Audit Your Current Strategy:
  Look at your social media, website, and any other marketing channels. Are you sharing context? Are you transparent about your journey? Identify any gaps.
• Incorporate Educational Content:
  Provide actionable tips and share the “how” behind your successes. This not only educates your audience but also positions you as a trusted expert.
• Offer Multiple Entry Points:
  Create free resources like blog posts, webinars, or mini-courses that offer value. Then, invite your audience to deeper engagement opportunities when they’re ready.

Step 3: Cultivate Meaningful Relationships

• Engage Regularly:
  Don’t just broadcast your message—interact with your audience. Reply to comments, host live Q&A sessions, and show genuine interest in their journeys.
• Be Available:
  Set aside time for discovery calls or one-on-one chats. Even if these aren’t immediately converted into sales, they build long-term trust and connection.
• Foster Community:
  Create spaces where your audience can connect with you and each other. Whether it’s a Facebook group or regular virtual meetups, community builds support and accountability.

Step 4: Balance Hustle with Rest

• Schedule Downtime:
  Build self-care into your calendar. Whether it’s a walk in nature, meditation, or simply unplugging for a few hours, rest is crucial for sustained creativity and clarity.
• Celebrate Small Wins:
  Every step forward is a victory. Celebrate progress—even if it’s not a massive breakthrough—and use those moments as fuel to keep going.
• Adjust When Needed:
  Monitor your energy and your business metrics. If something isn’t working, be willing to pivot. Flexibility is key to long-term success.

Step 5: Evaluate and Evolve

• Solicit Feedback:
  Ask your clients, peers, and community for feedback on your approach. Their insights can help you refine your strategy and stay aligned with your values.
• Review Your Goals Regularly:
  Business is dynamic, and your goals may evolve. Set aside time each quarter to review your progress and adjust your plans accordingly.

Invest in Continuous Learning:
Stay curious and keep learning. Whether it’s new marketing strategies, personal development, or technical skills, growth is a lifelong journey.

Trusting Your Intuition and Creating Change

I’ve shared a lot today about the trends that give me the ick in the online coaching space—and why I believe that ethical, transparent, and heart-centered strategies are the way forward. If you’ve ever felt the discomfort of high-pressure tactics, misleading success stories, or the glorification of hustle culture without acknowledging the need for rest, know that you’re not alone.

My journey has taught me that authenticity is not just a buzzword—it’s a way of life. When you build your business on trust, transparency, and genuine connection, you create something that not only resonates with your audience but also feels good to you. Every coach deserves to work in a space that honors their values and supports their well-being.

Remember, you are the CEO of your own business. You don’t have to follow the trends or subscribe to the toxic marketing tactics that dominate our feeds. Instead, choose a path that allows you to be both successful and true to who you are.

Your Next Steps to Vibrant Visibility

I know that making changes in your business can feel overwhelming at times. It takes courage to stand against the grain and forge your own path. But here’s the good news: you don’t have to do it alone.

I invite you to join me in creating a business that’s not just profitable, but also aligned with your heart and values. Whether you’re a seasoned coach or just starting out, there are resources and communities designed to help you grow in a sustainable, authentic way.

Ready to Embrace a New Way of Coaching?

If you’re feeling inspired and ready to take your business to the next level, I’d love for you to consider joining my group program, Vibrant Visibility. This isn’t just another program—it’s a space where you can learn actionable strategies for ethical marketing, build genuine relationships, and create a business that feels both profitable and deeply aligned with your soul.

What You’ll Get in Vibrant Visibility:

• Actionable Strategies: Clear, step-by-step guidance on building your business with transparency and integrity.
• Community Support: Connect with like-minded heart-centered coaches who are on the same journey.
• Tailored Feedback: Whether through group sessions or even a coveted one-on-one coaching spot, receive personalized advice to help you overcome your unique challenges.
• Sustainable Growth: Learn how to balance hustle with rest, ensuring that your business evolves without burning you out. 

How to Get Started?

Apply Now:

Click here to apply for Vibrant Visibility. Let’s create a space where your authentic voice shines, and your business can grow in a way that feels right for you.

Book a Business Planning Session:

Not ready for the full program? No worries. I offer a free 30-minute business planning session where we can chat about your goals, challenges, and how you can move forward in a way that feels aligned. It’s a relaxed, no-pressure conversation designed to help you gain clarity. Book here.

Join the Community:

Even if you’re not ready for a full commitment, I invite you to join our free Facebook community where I share tips, inspiration, and real talk about building a business that truly matters. It’s a space for connection, support, and growth.

Thank you for taking the time to read through my thoughts on the icky trends in the online coaching space. I hope this post resonated with you and provided some actionable insights on how to build a business that feels authentic, ethical, and sustainable. Remember, you have the power to choose a different path—one that honors your values, your well-being, and your unique journey as a coach or healer.

If any part of this post sparked something in you—whether it’s a desire to shift your mindset, rethink your marketing, or simply pause and reflect—I encourage you to take the next step. Let’s create a future where coaching is about genuine connection, ethical growth, and most importantly, a celebration of our true selves.

Are you ready to transform your business and embrace vibrant visibility?
Head over to Vibrant Visibility to learn more about the program, apply for a spot, or even secure a one-on-one coaching session with me. I’m here to support you every step of the way on your journey to building a heart-centered, soulful business.

Stay vibrant, stay visible, and most importantly, stay true to yourself.

XO
Shawne